Nerd Alert

My nine-year-old brother Ian is a hell-raiser. He’s loud, he’s rambunctious, and his attention is difficult to capture and impossible to hold on to. He’s not a bad child, don’t get me wrong, but he is what one imagines when they conjure up and image of an elementary school boy. By simply watching him interact with other children it would be easy to conclude that he is vulgar and obnoxious with everyone, especially other nine-year-olds. In reality, that is not the case with Ian Bruce. 

Lauren Costa was six when she and Ian met in their first grade class. She was quiet, and very tiny for her age, but despite their differences she and Ian became fast friends. She followed him everywhere, and he made her his number one priority whenever they were together. 

“I protect her,” he told me once. “She’s so small and sometimes people are mean to her, and I need to keep her safe.”

She brought something out of Ian I’d never seen before. He treated her like a little sister, helping her when he could and always looking out for her safety and happiness. To her parents she called him “my Ian,” she would call him on the phone just to talk, and she told whomever would listen that the two of them would get married some day. Ian, in a manner uncharacteristic of any nine-year-old boy, didn’t get mad or embarrassed when she said that. To him it meant he was doing what he set out to do; being a good friend and giving his fragile friend sanctuary from the evils of elementary school life.

They were perfect for each other, but nothing as perfect as they were together can last.

Lauren Costa had medulloblastoma, a form of brain cancer with a staggeringly high mortality rate. She passed away three days ago, on Christmas.

I don’t know what to say from here. It’s impossible to apply words to such a tragedy without coming of as self-righteous. Ian was odd when he heard about the death of his playmate; it’s understandable that someone so young wouldn’t know how to react, but he was clearly moved by it. He’s been acting out since then. Not violently or aggressively, but he has been behaving differently. He’s been louder and has rarely taken a moment to rest, which on the surface seems normal, but whenever someone mentions Lauren, he quietly exits the room.

Ian is nine years old. Last year his friend from down the street passed away, also of cancer. He has lost two close friends to illness, and I at twenty-one have lost none.

My heart aches when I think of how my brother must actually be feeling. I know it’s only a matter of time before he can’t hold it in anymore, but Ian is not the victim.

The thoughts and prayers of myself and my entire community go out to the Costa family and to their late daughter. May she rest in peace.